Growing up from a single-parent home!

After almost 10 years, I am more mature to talk about the impacts of my mother's sudden death that occurred in our family. The loss was too painful to bear that my brain could not process anything regarding the understanding of both the medical and legal procedures at the age of 19. Even now, as I have to read through pages of getting her remains to be cremated after the ten-year rental of burial site. I am surprised that I can finally face the terrible scenes of both physical and emotion hurt that my mother faced before her departure to heaven. I am glad that I have feelings and can handle them, because I knew that I wasn't able to do that at all - except keep living on a life that cheers up my bro and father.

I encouraged my father to act as both a father and a mother in the family on my wedding day! He loves me and wants me to be happy even after leaving him to become somebody's wife. It's tough, but yet our dog, Charlie, has made a good transition for handing me over! (better than my father) Imagine - when everyone in the family is sick, you could not do anything except trusting the Lord to shine the Light of salvation into our family. There is nothing worse than death if life isn't worth living. I remember from FIFA about the game with Argentinians vs. Germans that the Argentinians should pack their baggages home w/o wasting my time and money, because the Argentinians were completely wiped out by the other team w/o putting any extra efforts to make a miracle happen! I hate games like this - same as living in daily life that we have to give in our total self to love! Yet - it's easier to say than to do. When there is unknown sickness in our psyche, the cycle can only be broken through the celebration of Christ in our lives.

I have always thought of getting married to the Church, which means to become a sister, at the very back of my mind from a young age. I have always been attracted to the beautiful stories of saints, the loving hymns, and the coloring books from religious studies classes. Getting married into a family who rarely practises the Catholic faith is a big challenge for me, because I wonder how can I reconcile this brokenness without being too bossy? Same as the idea of how a single parent could manage a household, if the family does not practise the same faith together very often?

However, I shall declare that my father is a very good man because he is a good father to me. God reveals the mysteries of faith through the beginnings of my life, as I trust in the goodness of my father. I hope that one day my brother would also do the same!